Hello everybody, as I just wrote in my introduction thread, I have a wonderful testimony why I decided to be a Christian. Now please bear with me since it's rather long. Anyway, I always claimed to be a Christian when I was a kid. When both of my grandparents were still alive they raised me up in a Baptist church since they were both the fire and brimstone kind of folks which is fine, but as I wrote in my introduction thread as well, that's just not the type of person or Christian that I am. I believe that you should want to follow God out of love not out of fear. So yeah, I stopped going to church because I had the literal fear of God put into me and I didn't like it one bit so I sort of backslid when I got older. Then about a year ago my brother invited me to a Methodist church that he went to because he already had some friends that he knew there and I couldn't believe the change. Everybody was really loving and friendly and then I realized what Jesus was really all about. As a child I already knew that God loved me and that's why He sent His Son Jesus to die for my sins on the cross, but I never really understood why and what it was really about. I never appreciated the importance of it until about last summer. Now this is where my story gets a bit difficult for me to talk about and I really hope that I don't get judged too much on my first day here but I am a twenty-seven (twenty-eight this month) year old woman who is a little bit less than happy to report that I am engaged to my high school sweetheart. The only problem is that he is behind bars for a crime that he did not commit. So, even though deep down in my heart that it wasn't God's fault I started yelling at Him and blaming Him for it anyway and that's where my life started to change forever. Now I'm not sure who around here believes that God has the ability to communicate with us and we do have the ability to communicate with Him, or if anybody here has ever had God speak directly to them before, but that night after I yelled and cussed Him out tearfully wondering how a loving God could ever do this to me, I heard a soft and soothing voice inside my mind telling me that He was there with me and that everything was going to be alright. When I asked Him if it really was Him who was talking to me or whether or not I was going crazy He assured me that I wasn't and that He was really there. The only reason that He didn't respond to me before is because I wasn't ready to listen to Him. That night and many nights afterwards I swore that there was a presence inside my room. It's like I could actually feel His gentle touch at times. That's when things started getting weirder. I remember that I was sitting outside on my front porch one day eating my lunch still wondering whether or not I truly was going crazy. That's when God spoke to me again and He told me "Be still and know that I am God." Now you have to realize I'm still only a beginner when it comes to reading my Bible, but yet that sounded to me like it was something that was written in there and sure enough I looked it up and found it in Psalms 46:10. And if that wasn't weird enough I also heard Him tell me that He has me and my fiancée Joe engraved upon the palms of His hands. So I just had to look it up and found it yet again where it is talked about in the Bible. In Isaiah 49:16 it says; "Behold, I have graven thee on the palms of my hands, thy walls are continually before me." Now when I read that I was starting to becomes less skeptical in my mind, but I was still doubting it a bit and wondering whether or not I had just gotten lucky. However what happened next completely changed my mind. All of a sudden out of nowhere two dates had come into my mind which were 1995 and 1998. A few days later while I was grabbing some cookies from the snack cupboard the Lord came to me again and He told me that He knew what my future and mother in-law was going through right now, for He had to stand by and watch as His own Son was brutally beaten and murdered. But He wanted her to know that He was always there for her from the time that she lost her babies and the time that she was sexually abused when she was a little girl. So I called her up and I told her, listen, you don't have to answer this if you don't want to, but have you ever miscarried before? And she answered yes twice. Once was in 1995 and the other was in 1998. At that moment it suddenly hit me and I got goosebumps on both of my arms and I told her; "Well, I just thought you should know that God just told me that He has got your son and daughter tightly inside His arms up in Heaven waiting for you." At that moment she had become speechless. I came to find out that she was sexually abused when she was a child too. Now, I admit, there are times when I can hear the Lord talking clearer to me than other times but at this point in time I am definitely a believer. I know that somebody or something is definitely trying to communicate with me and I don't really believe there's any other logical explanation to me than it really is the Almighty God Himself. He just told me something really important recently too that I just want to share with you all. Last night I told Him; "Lord, I love you from the bottom of my heart and I really appreciate everything that you have done for me, but if this all has really been happening to me, then why do I still doubt?" And He answered; "It's because you're only human. And humans have trouble believing in what they can't see or touch even if it's smack dab in front of their face, but just remember one thing April,..the love and the belief that you have in Me is a lot stronger than your doubt." And after He said that I realized right away that He was right. At this time I look to Him more than a Father, but a friend. He is somebody that makes me laugh with His sense of humor (and yes the question has been officially answered God has a sense of humor) and comforted me when I needed it. He is somebody that I like as well as love. So anyway, I'm sorry that my testimony was so long but I hope that you all have enjoyed it and have been touched by it in some way or form.