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John Calvin puts forward a very simple reason why love is the greatest gift: “Because faith and hope are our own: love is diffused among others.” In other words, faith and hope benefit the possessor, but love always benefits another. In John 13:34–35 Jesus says, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” Love always requires an “other” as an object; love cannot remain within itself, and that is part of what makes love the greatest gift.
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No Mind (TLS)

My version of a self-introduction...

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...is to not.

 

Whom to please? Ideally, everybody. Each has their rightful preferences, needs, and sometimes greater-need-than-our-contrary-need. How do we negotiate such a landmine of society? Holy barkdust Batman!

 

In my case, I have not yet learned how to righteously please certain types of people. Like nearly everybody, or so it seems to me.

 

Ok. I'm mild mannered. That's about it.

 

But say I walk into a room, and there are nine people in there. Six of them I have never met before. Two of them I know well. The ninth one I have never met before, nor know anything about. This ninth person more-or-less openly, but very ambiguously, often expresses offence when a new person does not greet mutually new persons in an outgoing and...something manner.

 

Say, too, that in this case, I'm feeling ill (that's essentially always, in my case, as I have, just to begin with, autism (for many on the ASD spectrum, including me, it's not particularly unlike a life-long concussion) and want to be home. But, as it happens, of the two of the nine persons in the room that I have met and knew well, one of those two had decided that it is best that I meet the seven before I go. This is why I even enter this room full of people who all look expectant to meet whomever comes in the door.

 

But, this one of the two does not know that I feel ill, and so does not introduce me with such provision. Instead, this one of the two merely names me to the seven, and wordlessly expects me to introduce myself. I do not know that I would be expected to introduce myself.

 

And in this case, all nine people that are there are under some habit of expecting that a new person will introduce himself in a happy and informative, even professional manner. And, in this case, I don't know this.

 

So here you might see, maybe, just a little of what it is to be me.

 

Thank you.

 

"Welcome to Humans Anonymous."

 

Hi, I'm ____. I'm a human.

 

 

 

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Welcome to the forum.

 

You will always be frustrated if you try to please everyone. No matter what you do there will be some who don't like it. I have learned to just accept this fact and have stopped worrying about it.

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Staff

Welcome No Mind

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Welcome to the forum.

 

You will always be frustrated if you try to please everyone. No matter what you do there will be some who don't like it. I have learned to just accept this fact and have stopped worrying about it.

 

Good advice.

 

But, firstly, frustration is not the way I would describe it. I have never, ever once, set out to please. It's just that...

 

...I'm neurodevelopmentally incapable of applying, or employing, such advice. Just to begin with, I have a certain hyper-empathic function that is, by definition, savant level. And did I mention that that's just to begin with??

 

The complications are not anything most people ever would believe on little notice ("Hey, did you know of such-and-such a thing that you already are so sure is logically impossible that you have never encountered the very idea of it until I just told you?") That is, at least under most conditions---and of which are nearly constant for me, days at a time with hardly a lone minute of any effective measure of let-up. And that's just on the careful good diet, never mind that which many persons are so happy to try to have me eat (like, "trust me, it's good for you, I should know, since I cannot imagine how it could be bad for anyone.")

 

Therefore, especially from people who have the most influence over me (by formal, informal, or other relation), I try to avoid provoking extreme incredulity about how my mind, perceptions, emotions, what-have-you, does and does not function.

 

And that's assuming just both that the very idea of telling them occurs to me and that I have the sheer articulateness to begin to put to it a single word of description or explanation. I do alright with writing, but then only if its in no way effectively vicariously meddled with by my terror of these kind of people. On the outside I'm typically so mild-mannered you would never know it. The inside is what counts in my case, and its very far from resembling even the outwardly-and-inwardly 'crazy' persons with whom I have had to deal.

.

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Staff

Welcome No Mind!

 

God bless,

William

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BTW, is there no Search function here? I'm looking for something in particular right now, but I do not notice any Search function.

 

Search function should be visible upper right of your screen. Unless your resolution is small. The Search feature does not display then but is visible here: https://www.christforums.org/search?q=&searchJSON=%7B%22sort%22%3A%22relevance%22%7D&AdvSearch=1

 

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